I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Children cease to be precious when they crap their shorts in the pool I exercise at.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
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