it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
The stoned girl at the dining hall just handed me a single chicken wing and insisted that she's "unable to procure more rations"
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
