I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
