Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Randomize
