I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
she looked like the before picture.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
