I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Dude, I lost my shirt, and my doorknob is gone. I'm not sure which I should find first
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Randomize
