I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Like honey no, I’m getting groceries while pretending that having sexy talk with you is turning me on
Randomize
