3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
As a general rule of thumb, I don't call until the claw marks have healed.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
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