i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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