Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
