Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
he's like a horny 3rd grader on cocaine. he needs a leash
Let's get the cat blown out
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Randomize
