We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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