i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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