Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
It was his birthday this weekend. I had to carry him 6 blocks, in 3 inch heels. The entire time he was trying to molest me, eat my face, and try to stop every two feet to tie his shoe. He would light a cigarette, forget about it, almost burn everyone, throw it out, then decide he wanted to smoke. He kept repeating that he trusts me with his life.
...Wow...
I could be a kindergarten teacher
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I DONT HAVE THE SOCIAL SKILLS TO EXPLAIN THAT YOU DIED EATING MY PUSSY
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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