My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
everyone is single if you try hard enough
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
