shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
so i completely puked my brains out. a lot. he held me up so i could brush my teeth. then we proceeded to hook up for the next four hours.
he's a keeper
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Yah... You need to get here. Evan just peed off the karaoke stage.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Randomize
