i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I accidentally brought up how there used to be a big tree in his yard, which I could only have known if I had been Google mapping his house.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize