im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
Randomize
