This is not my ceiling
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
Randomize
