there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
I woke up and the only 2 bowls I own were shattered on my floor. Pretty sure my hand and tailbone are broken and I have no idea what the fuck happened
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
