Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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