Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
Dignity is for republicans.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
You were trust falling into bushes
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
A cop may or may not have seen my bare ass against the moonlight within the past hour
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
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