I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
getting up at 8am to start drinking seemed like a much better idea before I had to wake up at 8am
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
