"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
