ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
Woke up with an entire pizza face down in my bed beside me... untouched. Never beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
