I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
