Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
I found out that they tried to reenact the Snooki drop by using a jump rope and the banister. Pictures say it all.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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