Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
