and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
