i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Next year we will be 30 and no more shots during the week.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
and then I drunkenly screamed, "you can ride that Uber all the way to revenge city!"
which was funny until I realized I paid for my enemy's cab to go fuck my ex
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize
