is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
In other news, I just burned my penis
I'm smoking pot with a man in a pink suit, size 15 wide shoes who bought his bowl from a place called Chinese Bling Bling while I'm dressed as a unicorn drinking pumpkin beer
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Randomize
