too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Apparently I stole windex from the cab driver. Klepto Tom strikes again.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
Randomize
