chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
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