hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Somehow ended up home, probably had something to do with the makeshift ladder from my second story window. Now headed to church, still drunk, and still fighting back the vomit of a thousand different alcohols. Successful night.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
Goal: finish my bio assignment before the Xanax kicks in.
Randomize
