Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
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