I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
True strength comes from lack of pants
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
