I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
His wedding band got caught on my nipple ring and that's how I realized he was married
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
Randomize
