I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
he thought i was a dude.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize
