oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
