He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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