But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Randomize
