shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
He offered to dress his dick up as Charlie Chaplin to cheer me up.
Keep him.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
