well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
