It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize
