I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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