True but thats because hes a fetus.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Randomize
