My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
So they discontinued the hummer... Now people will have to go door to door to let others know they're assholes
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I just found an old slice of LIME in my wallet?????????
Randomize
