she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
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