**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
17 year olds will be the death of me.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
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