Who would have guessed that ordering a vodka lemonade at Roscoe's was code for I want a hand job
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I'm not really that drunk, but I think vampires should glow in the dark because otherwise it's just unfair
Found more tequila
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
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