Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
