I accidentally burped into my bong.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Randomize